Made to Crave

So I have been studying this book with one of my accountability groups this month and I must say it is really eye opening. I decided to do this because I had been lacking a connection if that makes sense. I have been feeling so unconnected to everything especially God and his presence that I needed something. When I saw that another coach had done the same thing on her spiritual and physical journey I thought... heck yeah, that may be just what I need.

Well it has really been eye opening and I am really enjoying it. Tonight's lesson was about "TRIGGERS" oh man does that hit home for me. I don't know about you but this is the story of my life. I love the analogy of algebraic variables and triggers.. I am always doing so good..... until I am not.. My triggers just like hers can range from something my husband didn't say or do (usually he has no idea he was supposed to do or say anything...lol) or a bad day, feeling overwhelmed, ungrateful children or quite frankly it could be as simple as things not going my way. Or that feeling of jealously, I get the "it's not fairs" when I see other people getting to eat and drink and do things I can't.. OH Man that is the worst... talk about wanting to eat your feelings. I want to eat them more when I think other people are getting to have fun in ways I am not allowed to. Just the other day I was having a pretty good pity party for myself. I was feeling defeated and like why even bother given just how long and how far I still have to go. But those thoughts and feelings are all lies that I have gotten used to repeating to myself. It is so refreshing to have that reiterated to me, especially now when I am in a place in my journey where I should practice remembering this truth, replacing those lies with truth and adjusting accordingly.  My favorite part of tonight's passage was the prayer. I am going to repeat this daily and maybe even have it mounted in my kitchen somewhere "FOOD CAN FILL MY STOMACH BUT NEVER MY SOUL". I pray I will remember that when I am looking for something to stuff into my mouth even though I know I am not hungry. I am going to add this to my prayers.. for God to help me see what it is I am truly hungry for when I find myself wanting eat to no satisfaction. And then I will ask for direction on how to find it.  But first I will have to PAUSE... isn't that Christianity and dieters 101. Pause and wait on God or Pause and think about how you will feel after you give in to that moment of weakness. Pause and see if your really hungry or just thirsty. Pause and wait on God for direction....I have never thought about triggers in this way before. As a matter of fact, I don't really give much thought to triggers and the truth of what they really are. I am so used to feeling like it is always my fault, flaws or my character defects that make me do it when I give in to a temptation. I have never taken a moment to think beyond the surface of that temptation or trigger before. The deeper issue is, it is a trigger to which at the core is my need or desire for something far more profound and can only be fulfilled with the help of God and only his knowledge and strength can help me defeat it and cure it.